By the time you read this post, our twenty-one year old son will be on a plane, traveling to Tokyo, Japan for a three month study-abroad program. Speaking from the heart of a mom, it is excruciatingly hard to let him go.
Even though our son is six feet tall and has whiskers on his chin, he is and always will be my little boy. When I look into the confident eyes of our now young adult, I still see our scared little boy on that first day of school, holding onto my pants leg, kicking and screaming while the preschool teacher attempted to pry him away from me. (Those were the good old days—the days when he needed me.)
In my head I know that Ben is more than capable of succeeding on his own; he is very independent and mature beyond his years. Even though I know this in my head, in my heart, I worry and rehearse over all the “what ifs”. What if he gets lonely? What if he gets lost? What if he gets mugged?
I voiced some of these concerns to our son.
Ben’s reply?
“Mom… I’m not going to get lonely… Tokyo is one of the most populated cities in the world.”
“Mom… if I get lost I can ask for directions or use a map.” (That’s all well and good, but you and I both know the likelihood of him asking for directions is slim to none. He’s a man!)
Our son’s final response to help put my mind at ease?
“Mom… Tokyo has one of the lowest crime rates of any big city. It is unlikely that I will get mugged. I’ll be just fine!”
My mind might be more at ease, but my heart is still breaking.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)
I am learning that letting go as a parent is just part of the process. Millions of moms have gone before me and passed this test with flying colors. I would venture to guess that I will too… eventually.
Until then, I am asking for your coveted prayers, both for our son and for me and my husband. Although he doesn’t voice his concerns as freely, I’m pretty sure Dad is a little anxious too.
Over the next few months, I will write about our family’s journey to a foreign land. I’m sure God has many life lessons to teach us along the way.
“Listen, my sons, to a father’s instruction; pay attention and gain understanding. I give you sound learning, so do not forsake my teaching.” (Proverbs 4:1-2)