By Michele Eich
Navigating the empty nest stage of life brings a mix of emotions. One day I’m loving the freedom my husband and I have to go on new adventures. The next minute I am looking at my kids’ baby pictures with tears in my eyes. Through all of it, God’s presence carries me through every season of life.
I am feeling a bit melancholy as I write this, so let me start out with a funny story that happened when we first became empty nesters after raising children for 35 years. Due to his job, my husband and I moved away from all of our kids after sending our sixth child off to college. We had settled into our new home and decorated it to fit our style. I walked out to the kitchen one morning to start the coffee pot then let out a loud scream. My husband came running into the room and asked what was wrong. I said, “It’s still clean!” No one had made puppy chow in the middle of the night. The oven was not on from the pizzas they decided to fix after bedtime. I didn’t have crusty dishes on the counter. It was neat and clean, just the way I had left it the night before. Imagine that!
Ah yes, the empty nest does have its advantages. One minute I am rejoicing over the perpetually clean house until I walk down the hall and see family pictures that cause me to miss my “babies.” Cue the tears!
One extremely bright spot in this season is being Nana. I recently went to visit my six-month-old granddaughter. Due to sickness, I was not able to see her for two looooong months. I walked through the door ready for some baby snuggles, but she looked at me as if I were a stranger. All she wanted at that moment was her mommy.
Even though my heart was a bit crushed, I completely understood. She eventually warmed up, and we read a book, caught up with the latest family news, and played with her many toys. I was able to rock her to sleep, and I savored the beautiful moments of this precious time.
It got me thinking about my children when they were that age, and all they wanted was Mom, a safe place of comfort and love. I was their world, and they were mine. So many tender moments of mother and child stir in my memory. I would enter the room, and their little faces would light up. The very moment the cry turned into laughter brings a smile today. I could feel the relief as I picked them up, and their little bodies melded into mine. When they would fall and hurt themselves, they would want the comfort of Mom to pick them up and soothe them and no one else would do. Oh, how a mother loves to carry her children!
I see mommas raising littles today, and they are weary, exhausted, and probably wishing for a little peace and quiet just like I used to do. (Back then, a mini vacation for me meant a trip to the grocery store alone.) I want to give these mommies a hug and a gentle reminder that these days pass all too quickly. As the saying goes, they truly do grow up way too fast.
Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and relive those moments of chaotic joy. I would appreciate those seasons of being the center of their world and not so concerned about my messy house or unending piles of laundry. I wish I would have embraced these days and soaked them up more than I did. God lets us apply this knowledge with our grandchildren, and we are now wise enough to realize that these fleeting opportunities are to be cherished. So, we slow down and savor these precious moments.
My kids have grown up to become amazing adults. I enjoy great conversations with them now and feel a great sense of pride as they navigate life. They are in relationships, have jobs, and I don’t get to see them as often as I would like. They have busy lives and do not always have as much time for Mom. I understand that this is all part of the ebb and flow of life and its multitude of seasons.
I can feel the tender heart of Jesus in all of this. Our Savior relates beautifully to the longing of a mother’s heart to love and protect her brood, especially in the midst of tumultuous times. Jesus said, “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing” (Matthew 23:37 NIV).
I still carry my children, but it looks a lot different today. They are always in my heart of course, but now I carry them to Jesus. I pray for them as they go about their lives in a world full of uncertainties. I lovingly remember the many times I physically carried them, but for now, I carry them to the foot of the cross. I bring them to the One who loves them even more than their mom does, for He is the One who has and will always carry me.
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