Today’s Post By: Hannah Hartzell (Click Here to learn more about Hannah)
When my mom was pregnant with me, my parents asked my older brother—three at the time—what they should name his little sister. As I’ve been told, he looked at them and firmly asserted: “Cantaloupe,” because he enjoys the fruit so much.
Truth be told, we now joke that he spoke prophetically because cantaloupe is my favorite food. However, that’s not quite fair because I’m a fruit snob in general. Apples; oranges; berries, you name it. I love fresh fruit. In fact, I eat it every morning with breakfast and lately I’ve been hooked on strawberries in particular.
Last week, as I was preparing strawberries, I stumbled upon this beauty:
How often do you see a Siamese twin strawberry? Seriously: it’s one of a kind. As I chopped it up—after snapping a pic—I couldn’t get over how pretty it was. It was unlike any strawberry in the bunch. It was a tiny sign of the individual beauty all around us, but not insignificant in the least. “That’s one cool strawberry God,” I said, smiling at the simple joy it had provided. That’s when I heard His voice whisper back. Why is it so easy for you to see it’s beauty, but not your own?
I was taken aback at the question. Why was it so hard? I’m in the process of restoring weight currently, and I’ll tell you flat out: It’s not fun! Nothing about “shrinking” pants or my changing body is delightful. I have to let go of the identity I found in my eating disorder (E.D), and grab hold of who Christ says I am. I’m not a cookie-cutter kind of girl. None of us are. He gave me legs that can run like I love, but I am more than just an athlete. I’m a woman. No two of us are the same. We were all crafted by our maker, and He delights in us:
“You have ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; you have ravished my heart with one look of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.” (Song of Solomon 4:9)
Widely accepted as an allegory of God’s relationship with His people, Song of Solomon paints an amazing picture of God’s love for us. He delights in us, for we are made in His image. I hate that it is so hard to see that. I hate that I feel gross in my own body, conflicted when I look in a mirror. I hate that.
But I am reminded of that crazy looking strawberry, the one that took me out of my routine and reminded me that beauty is distinct; it is different. Most importantly: Beauty is defined by God, not be the latest fads or tabloids. It is a very difficult concept to truly understand in the midst of such societal pressures, but I truly believe that God will heal my heart and my mind as I fill myself with more of Him and less of this world. And I believe the same for you. You were designed by God, purposed for joy and freedom in Him. Maybe you’ve heard those words before, but truly let them sink in. You were purposed. Purposed. He has a plan for you, and it includes the body He has given you.
Right now, body image is a daily struggle for me. When I remember that God’s love for me though, it is a little easier to let go of E.D (Eating Disorder) and cling to Christ. We don’t have to be afraid of letting go of control because He is always in control. We don’t have to try and fit the mold because the same One who sculpted the mountains and painted the skies has made us. I’m still desperately clawing my way free from the jaws of perfectionism, and asking Jesus to help me see myself as He does. I can’t tell you if that strawberry tasted any different than the rest, but I do know that it was unique. It was special. It was beautiful. And you, my friend, are too.
