Today’s Post By: Rae Lynn DeAngelis
This coming Saturday our son, Ben, graduates from college.
I did not attend college, myself, but based on what I’ve witnessed through our children’s experience, I’ve ascertained that college graduation is a time filled with mixed emotions: excitement, relief, a sense of accomplishment, anticipation, apprehension, and fear. Students are left with questions like: What now? Where do I go from here?
The world’s answer?
Find a job in your field of study, apply the things you’ve learned, gain experience, climb the company ladder, and live the American dream.
Sounds good, but surely there’s more to it than that, right?
The problem with the world’s way is that several years down the road of life we struggle because we’ve learned to define ourselves by what we can or cannot do, instead of who we are. Our sense of identity and worth grow murky when we too closely identity ourselves with our jobs, families, friends, or even hobbies.
At age fifty I’m just now beginning to have a clearer understanding of my identity and purpose in life. In the past, I defined myself by the roles I’ve played or the accomplishments I’ve made.
Here’s what I’m learning. We should never hang our identity or self-worth on accomplishments or roles, because all of these things change with the ebb and flow of life. Kids grow up, couples get divorced, jobs come and go, and seasons change. And, in case you haven’t noticed… the world is fickle. One minute you’re a hero; the next minute you are a zero.
I’m a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, ministry leader, author, and speaker. But these things are not the core of who I am.
I’ve been married for twenty-nine years, mothered and homeschooled two children, founded a non-profit organization, and wrote and published four books. Yet, these accomplishments are not the summation of who I am.
To understand ourselves at our core, we must first seek the One who created us.
“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.” (Psalm 139:1-3)
God took great care when He created us, making each person unique from the other.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” (Psalm 139:13-14)
Who I am (who I really am) is the summary of that which is unique to me personally: my personality traits, gifts, talents, life experiences, hopes, and dreams.
“My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” (Psalm 139:15-16)
As we reflect on the deeper issue of who we are, apart from what we can or cannot do, we begin to have a clearer picture of our true selves and unleash our God-given influence to make a true impact in the world.
The core of who we are does not change like fashion trends. Yes, we grow and mature as God molds and shapes us into clearer image bearers of Himself, but the centrality of ourselves, the person God created us to be, is always there. As we embrace this profound truth, everything else (our roles and accomplishments) are simply icing on the cake.
