3/23: Got application ready to go for tomorrow’s interview. Over the past week, I’ve been resting all of my cares upon God. When I begin to get worried or anxious, I immediately imagine myself falling into His arms and allowing Him to hold up the full weight of my body. It’s like a shepherd picking up a wounded lamb in his arms. Brings to mind Psalm 23.
3/24: Made it through the 2nd library interview. I rest assured that if that’s where God wants me, that’s where I’ll be. If not, there’s something else ahead. Eating has been good again. Mom and I went to the church for family movie night. It was an enjoyable time. I got introduced to a visitor who also struggles with addiction. For confidential reasons, I won’t be airing this wonderful God-given encounter.
3/26: I have been gung-ho all day. At church, I got a chance to talk to the woman who is struggling with addiction. I also gave her the LITM workbook and book and offered meeting with her. I believe God has been working in her life for some time now.
3/27: This has been quite a day. I could say it has been a plane crash kind of day and leave it at that. Thanks to mom, dad and my dear friend’s encouragement and speaking God’s truth to me, the plane landed safely. At the endocrine doc’s office, the nurse announced my weight. I almost buckled to the ground, and my heart almost leaped through my chest. I’ve lost 10 lbs. since December. I could see I was losing weight, but I also could see I was eating good and even began adding Boost and flax oil on top of meals. Seeing the number on the scale surprised and frightened me. Thoughts of defeat, worthlessness, and weakness swirled. As I type this right now, I stand with a triple dose of God’s empowerment. I’m ready for war!!! God always wins. He surrounded me with loved ones who encouraged me to keep pressing on.
3/28: Today has been a super eating day! God has given me an appetite beyond belief. I’ve actually been joyful eating all of it. Yesterday, I felt so weak and frail, but today I feel strong and mighty. My mindset has changed because my weight certainly hasn’t changed overnight. The LORD said to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness” (2Cor. 12:9a). Paul boasted in his weaknesses because it was in those weaknesses that the power of Christ made him strong. The library’s outreach director offered me a job one day per week. It is planning and programming for the local senior facilities. I gladly accepted. I’m learning to wait upon Him because He sees the big picture.
3/29: My appetite isn’t as big as it was yesterday, but it’s still raging. I have a feeling of excitement in me just thinking about the foods that I’m consuming. If I could draw a picture of the inner and outer energy I’m experiencing, it would be the Tazmanian Devil. I am just a whirlwind of energy and joy.
I called a church member who’s dying of cancer. She found out last March and she now has a hospice nurse coming in 2x/wk. Life can be so unexpectedly short. She said she just wants to see Jesus. She’s sick and tired and is ready to depart from this life on earth. It was so good talking and praying with her. I was called to be a ministering servant to her and she unknowingly was to me in return. Giving is so much more joyful and rewarding than receiving.
I was going to go to church tonight, but my brother and niece dropped in. Ava and I spent time collecting acorns and pine cones. She found a bucket of dirty rain water and dumped her collection into it and pretended she was fishing in it with a stick. What a sight!