Rhonda's Recovery Journey

“The footprints we leave behind show clearly where we have been, but they do not dictate where we can now go.” ~Ralph Martson

Week 38

3/2: I’ve been diligently doing 2 studies plus my own usual scripture study. If this is an addiction, I want it forever! I’m always anxious to dig in to see what the Spirit will reveal to me. God is becoming so real, so faithful, so glorious, so AWE-some to me!

3/4: Dad has been sick for 2 days, and I’m not well today. I think mine is irritable bowel and nerves. There are a lot of things happening this week. I am joining a different church, my job interview is Thursday, and my already worn car has water on the front and back floors because of a leaky broken sunroof. I am so thankful it still gets me where I need to go. What a reliable car it has been!

Just found out last night that my brother’s girlfriend’s daughter’s birthday is tomorrow. Whew! Try to say that 3x. Little time to find a special gift. I was pleased with the gift I chose and mom delivered it for me because I was beat by party time. My temperature was 93.7 so let’s just assume the thermometer mom bought this morning is wrong.

3/5: I again attended the church I’ve been visiting. Ken Ham was our guest speaker! It’s a beautiful sunny day and I walked a trail this afternoon. I have an excitement within.

3/6: I got called in to sub until who-knows-when. A couple of the ladies are having a bout with some kind of flu and respiratory illness. I sure hope I don’t end up with what dad has because my body would suffer and so would the diabetes.

Finally found dad a birthday present. It’s hard to buy for someone who has everything he needs. No cake until he’s able to eat without getting nauseated. I’m still struggling with exercise.

3/7: My sugar went high in the night, and I just can’t get it balanced. I have had severe nausea from it. After work and lunch, I had to lay down the rest of the afternoon because I felt so bad. I’ve been stressed over several things, and I’m sure this is the main contributor to the high glucose. I feel like a small rubber raft in a violent storm. I’m holding onto God’s promises with every ounce of energy in me. Fear, doubt and loneliness are very alive and active. I now do what I never did before June of last year–I continue to pursue God and not give up prayer and study. I choose to believe God’s promise in John 8:31-32! God is a God of might and power and loves me so much that He gave His one and only Son, Jesus Christ as atonement for my sins. He loves me and desires that I seek Him and believe Him. As I increasingly grow in knowing Him and trusting Him, I will be set fully free. I will not give up this time!! God, give me power to be as relentless in pursuing You as Satan is in pursuing me. God has won the victory!

3/8: I still have severe nausea and high glucose. After work, lunch and rest I went to the hospital for a blood draw. After waiting…tick, tock…and waiting, they concluded that they lost the order.

When I got home, I was glad to see mom brought food home from work because I was running short on time. I made it to church on time for the study and the resource people informed me class was postponed until next week. Oh great. I just traveled 40 minutes for nothing? That’s it, just stick another nail in my coffin. They said I was welcome to join in on the final Beth Moore’s “Entrusted” video. I was determined to stay and try to establish acquaintances in this new church and got to meet several women. I didn’t feel like I fit in at all. It was a lonely feeling.

To read Rhonda’s backstory, click here.